TITLE: Conflict Management Techniques
AUTHOR: Christy Hornung, Dodge City, KS
GRADE LEVEL/SUBJECT: 4-12
OVERVIEW: Conflict is largely a perceived phenomenon. It
is our perception of the situation that determines if a
conflict exists. It is useful to assess our predominant
conflict management style(s) because we tend to get stuck in
one or two styles and apply them inappropriately. The
emphasis is not on judging any style right or wrong. Each
person determines their predominant conflict management
style.
OBJECTIVES: Identify personal management style(s), develop
an awareness of strategies used in each conflict management
style.
SHARK - Competing - is assertive and uncooperative.
An individual pursues his or her own concerns at the other
person's expense. This is a power oriented mode in which
one uses whatever power seems appropriate to win ones own
position.
When to use Competition:
1. When you know you are right.
2. When you need a quick decision.
3. When you meet a steamroller type of person and you
need to stand up for your own rights.
TEDDY BEAR - Accommodating - is unassertive and
uncooperative.
This is the opposite of competing. When accommodating, an
individual neglects his/her own concerns to satisfy the
concerns of the other person. There is an element of self-
sacrifice in this mode.
When to use accommodating:
1. When the issue is not so important to you but it is to
the other person.
2. When you discover that you are wrong.
3. When continued competition would be detrimental - "you
know you can't win."
4. When preserving harmony without disruption is the most
important - "it's not the right time."
TURTLE - Avoiding - is unassertive and cooperative.
When a person does not pursue her/his own concerns or
those of the other person. He/she does not address the
conflict, but rather sidesteps, postpones or simply
withdraws.
When to use avoiding:
1. When the stakes aren't that high and you don't have
anything to lose - "when the issue is trivial."
2. When you don't have time to deal with it.
3. When the context isn't suitable - "it isn't the right
time or place."
4. When more important issues are pressing.
5. When you see no chance of getting your concerns met.
6. When you would have to deal with an angry, hot headed
person.
7. When you are totally unprepared, taken by surprise,
and you need time to think and collect information.
8. When you are too emotionally involved and the others
around you can solve the conflict more successfully.
OWL - Collaborating - is both assertive and cooperative.
This is the opposite of avoiding. Collaboration involves
an attempt to work with the other person to find some
solution which fully satisfies the concerns of both persons.
It includes identifying the underlying concerns of the two
individuals and finding an alternative which meets both sets
of concerns.
When to use collaboration:
1. When other's lives are involved.
2. When you don't want to have full responsibility.
3. When there is a high level of trust.
4. When you want to gain commitment from others.
5. When you need to work through hard feelings,
animosity, etc.
** The best decisions are made by collaboration.
FOX - Compromising - is intermediate in both assertiveness
and cooperativeness.
The objective of compromise is to find some expedient,
mutually acceptable solution which partially satisfies both
parties. It falls in the middle group between competing and
accommodating. Compromise gives up more than competing, but
is less than accommodating.
When to use compromise:
1. When the goals are moderately important and not worth
the use of more assertive modes.
2. When people of equal status are equally committed.
3. To reach temporary settlement on complex issues.
4. To reach expedient solutions on important issues.
5. As a back-up mode when competition or collaboration
don't work.
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