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Miscellaneous

TITLE:  Dynamics of Relationships

AUTHOR:  Gloria Fastabend, Nampa High, ID

GRADE LEVEL/SUBJECT:  9-12; psychology, adult living

OVERVIEW:  Many young people have misconceptions concerning
the nature of healthy relationships.  It is common to find
the attitude among young women that the ideal is to "lose"
their identity in their boyfriends, and it is equally common
to find young men who believe that their girlfriends should
defer to their needs, wants and desires.  This is largely
cultural, but also dysfunctional.

PURPOSE:  It is important to recognize the unique
contributions and attributes of each individual, including
yourself.  You can only bring something into a relationship
if you have something to bring.

OBJECTIVES:  Students will recognize that a relationship is
more than the sum of two people, it is dynamic and built on
the unique dimensions that are possessed by the people
involved.  When those two people are apart or together, they
retain their unique characteristics, but when they are
together, they combine to form a dynamic, flowing force.

RESOURCES/MATERIALS:  overhead projector, 2 transparencies

ACTIVITIES AND PROCEDURES:  Explaining the above principles,
put two overhead transparencies on the projector.  The first
should be heavy, straight lines, representing person A.  The
second should be entirely filled with concentric circles,
representing person B.  When the two transparencies are
overlaid, entirely or partially, unique and previously non-
existent patterns appear.  This should be followed by
discussion concerning the nature of healthy relationships,
and how each person contributes to the outcome.

TYING IT ALL TOGETHER:  This may seem like a fairly
simplistic demonstration, but it seems to capture the
imagination and effectively illustrate the point that the
goal is not to "lose" oneself in a relationship, but to find
the unique patterns that can develop as one touches the
lives of others.  This activity can be used to identify and
discuss the critical attributes of functional relationships,
as well as unhealthy ones where the patterns that develop
are uncomfortable or destructive.  It also opens up
discussion on the traits that tend to produce desirable
patterns and strong foundations in relationships.

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